Holy Water

Each Friday night after work, Bubba would fire up his outdoor grill

and cook a venison steak.  But, all of Bubba's neighbors were
Catholic........and since it was Lent, they were forbidden from
eating meat on Friday. The delicious aroma from the grilled venison steaks was causing
such a  problem for the Catholic faithful that they finally talked to their
priest.  The Priest came to visit Bubba, and suggested that he become
a Catholic.  After several classes and much study, Bubba attended
Mass........and  as the priest sprinkled holy water over him, he said,  "You were
born a Baptist, and raised a Baptist, but now you are a Catholic."
Bubba's neighbors were greatly relieved until Friday night arrived,
and the wonderful aroma of grilled venison filled the neighborhood.
The Priest was called immediately by the neighbors, and, as he
rushed into Bubba's yard clutching a rosary and prepared to scold him, he
stopped and watched in amazement. There stood Bubba, clutching a small bottle of holy water which he carefully sprinkled over the grilling meat and chanted:  "You wuz
born a deer, you wuz raised a deer, but now you is a catfish."

Test Drive

I love this line:

"People test drive cars before purchasing, and they only last 10 years. Why wouldn't you take a ride on a prospective boyfriend seeing that potentially it could be a lifelong commitment?"

My sentiments exactly!

Heat Wave

Temperature is currently 31 degrees Fahrenheit with a wind chill of 21 degrees.
Last week at this time it wasn't even above Zero.

We're having a heat wave,
A tropical heat wave,
The temperature's rising,
It isn't surprising,
She certainly can can-can.

She started a heat wave
By letting her seat wave
In such a way that
The customers say that
She certainly can can-can.

Gee, her anatomy
Makes the mercury
Jump to ninety-three.

We're having a heat wave,
A tropical heat wave,
The way that she moves
That thermometer proves
That she certainly can can-can.